When Tuesday Becomes Thursday

This is a blog about me. I have talked a lot about HistoryBoy. But I needed a little me time here, it is my blog after all, LOL. HistoryBoy is my sunshine, truly. He is the reason I get out of bed in the morning, even on days when I feel like I can’t, because I am too sore, or too tired or both. For those of you that don’t know, I have Lupus, it was diagnosed at 15, which was 20 years ago, so I cope fairly well (I think) with it, but I also get horrible migraines and I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia on top of the Lupus, so I am not coping as well lately.

I have had a couple of bad days (weeks… months), and they all blend together. I mark my calendar by doctor appointments. Tweak this med, add this. Does this help? It is the roller coaster of my life. Or it is how it feels sometimes. I am NOT asking for sympathy. All I am asking for I want energy. I want to bottle HistoryBoy’s energy and shoot an IV full of it into myself for even a day just to feel like myself again, even a little of my old self. I miss working and being able to do things that others take for granted.

I am on new meds right now which are helping but still not quite working and having some side effects, although not as bad as some other meds I have taken in the past. I just hate the let’s hope this works game. I always have to play do the benefits outweigh the side effects and lately the answers to those questions has been NO.

A friend of mine asked me, with all of my problems, what keeps me sane each day? What have I found that keeps me going? I told her my son keeps me going and my mom. My mom checks up on me every day and makes sure I am still kickin' whether I am having a good day or a bad day. Also, NOT focusing on what I can't do and thinking of what I can and will do. Guess I have to listen to my own advice and start figuring out what I CAN do and not worry so much about what I can’t.

I CAN finish this blog and then I CAN take a nap. Ahh I feel better already!

Please feel free to leave a comment or email me at teenahope@gmail.com