Every Mom Wants To See A Smile On Her Child's Face

I don't think any one of us says I was to be the mom who is sick and stays at home and disappoints her kid. Every mom wants to be thought of as Supermom. 

Unfortunately, for some of us that isn't possible, but I would really like to be able to work, coach my son's soccer team (it's the only way he will play), take him to karate and singing lessons, help with his homework, make dinner and relax after with my family, do whatever we want on the weekends day trip or museum and still teach Sunday School.  

I told a friend of mine this one time, they said to "Are you nuts, that is crazy? That's too much. Don't you want some free time?" I said I used to do all that, and I didn't mind it. I was spending time with my family." That looked at me like I was even crazier, like I was lying. 

Don't they realize the now is worse.  The festering trying to get my body to do what it needs to and it doesn't want to. Seven years ago I was relatively healthy doing all those things, working, coaching, playing, enjoying life, not just function through.  I don't want to just function.  I don't want him to see me just functioning, I want him to see me enjoying love, teach him to enjoy life, work hard and to love life. None of which I am doing now... 

For him, I just want to be

AF Diet ~ Days 28 & 29

Day 27: (Wednesday, January 29, 2014)

Breakfast: I had oatmeal for breakfast today, with raisins and some maple syrup.

Lunch:  I had Mahi-Mahi with white rice and grilled veggies. We were at the hospital with HistoryBoy so there was not alot of choice in their cafeteria, but it was good I have to admit. 

Dinner: Dinner was not really dinner since I was so tired but the time we got home.  I had some of Greg's fries from McD's  Are they Gluten Free?  I hope so... I was too tired to care in all honesty.  

Snacks:  TODAY I broke the rules, by mistake.  I had hot chocolate, which I do not know if it contained dairy of not.  I have noticed some do and some don't, but since this was out of machine, who knows and I was too cold to care.  I also ended up eating a Saltine, by mistake. HistoryBoy was given a snack after surgery and I (being hungry as we were there 6 hours by this point) grabbed one and possed it into my mouth, realizing mid-chew that uh oh Gluten. LOL We'll see how I feel tonight.  (although i am too tired to care)


Day 28: (Thursday, January 30, 2014)


Breakfast: I made oatmeal again.  This time I used raisins and oat milk to thicken it up.  It was really good.  I am going to try it again another day.  


Lunch: I made a salad for lunch, just lettuce and dressing. (Delicious Eulonia Vidalia Onion dressing.  This was purchased at a roadside stand on the way back from FL this past summer)  All natural and homemade.  I also had a blueberry muffin, Udi's brand.  It was good.  

Dinner: 

Snacks: 

When You Sign Up to Be A Mom...

When you decide to be a mom, or when you suddenly find or you are going to be a mom, like most of us, well my first inclination was to go holy crap! But after initial shock I started to plan. 

They don't issue a mommy card or a license with this job to prepare you. And all the books in the word do NOT prepare you for real life. I did READ all the books, What to Expect When You're Expecting, What to Eat When You're Expecting, but I have to let you know my FAVE was The Girlfriends' Guide to Pregnancy, it was better than those others hands down. I started The Girlfriends' Guide to Surviving 1st Year of Motherhood but I was still pregnant at the time and IN THE BOOK, it asked if I had time to read why I didn't take a nap so I did and I never picked it back up.


  Anyway, NONE of those books prepared me for a kid like HistoryBoy. Are the books out there for kids like him, cause at this point I am kinda winging it?  If there is an expert on my son I would LOVE to meet him or her.  And not one of those "fake" expects who knows all about my "type" of child.  I just need to love him more or reprimand him more. If this child gets anymore love he will live on my lap or move back into my uterus. And as far as reprimanding, you can't yell at a kid with Asperger's, it just doesn't work. I'm not saying we haven't tried it  sometimes when completely frustrated, believe me, I'm sure you've have your days too.  None of us is perfect. LOL.  He just shuts down. 

That is something we have to work on. I can just see that in the working out so well in the workplace; his boss yelling at him and HistoryBoy just not responding. But he is a teenager now and we expect some non-responsive-ness as well.  It's "normal" right? LOL.