REBOG - Please Don't Let Me Get Dirty!!

Reblog fron 4/27/11
You know how most kids are into playing in the dirt and mud and making messes. HistoryBoy was not like that. He would NOT touch a finger paint. He hated digging in the sand at the beach. He loved playing in the ocean but he had to wash off the sand. If he got food on his hand he had to wipe it off. 

These were all big clues to a larger sensory issue, but we always joked that he got my mom's clean freak genes. These are issues that can be worked on with most kids. We kept trying working with fingers paint. Here was something I tried. I used a paint with water book and let him dip his finger in the water. His fingers stay relatively clean and he colors. He thought it was neat. It is all in the baby steps. 



He finally got to the point now, where he will use fingers paint but he has to be allowed to wash his hands off as soon as he is done. And we let him not feel it was an issue. He didn't like having his hands dirty, so I had wipes or he made trips to the bathroom to wash his hands. It is what made him feel comfortable. Now he loves puddles and splashing, although he is usually wearing his sneakers at the time. Sand is something that he found out sea turtles build nests in so it must be cool to play in. Again, baby steps. We all take the world in in our own way.

As a Note: HistoryBoy nows loves to paint.  He doesn't like his hands majorly messy but it's ok if some paint get on him.  I pointed out that he wasn't the neatest eater sometimes, with his shirts or pants catching what missed him mouth.  He laughed and joked that his body was making up for his hands not wanting to be be messy.  Those baby steps are making me smile each day.

I would love to hear from you. Please feel free to leave a comment or email me at teenahope@gmail.com

REBLOG - WAY too Literal

from 8/24/11

We all know that our Aspies can be literal. HistoryBoy is very much so but it has become less and less noticeable. Maybe I am just used to it, or maybe it is because he knows he is too literal and has been using his literalness for humor with plays on words and so forth. I am happy about this because from I have read and learned from others, for most Aspies, a sense of humor is non existent but back to my point.

(HistoryBoy LOVED this.  He said it made perfect sense!)

As I stated, HistoryBoy is very literal, I can't use colloquialisms. They just make him go huh? most times. I remember arguing with my brother one time and telling him to take his head out of his butt. HistoryBoy looks at my brother then looks at me, looks back at my brother then tells me "Mom, his head isn't up his butt. How would he get his head up his butt anyway? It's too big." I think we all laughed over that one.

(When HistoryBoy saw this scene recently, he ACTUALLY got the joke but he is 14 now, this post that is being reblogged was originally written in 2011)

Another time he wasn't paying attention to me, and I called him a space cadet. He asked me if that was an astronaut. I said not exactly. LOL

I told him he was giving me grey hair. Honestly I only have about a dozen or so grey hairs but I attribute each and every one of them to him. And he kept asking me how can he cause my hair to turn color, and he wanted to know what he has to do to make it change color. I am not sure if he wanted to understand the phenomenon or see it in action.

(I could see HistoryBoy doing this)

I have been noticing him literalness less and less though. However yesterday we were at a get together and a made a comment. He had a flying monkey stuffed toy. And I made the comment I might not be quoting it exactly right (from an 80s or 90s movie) "and monkeys might fly out my butt" HistoryBoy stared at my butt, looks at his toy monkey and says what? I laugh and repeat what I said. He looks at me again confused, "How is that even possible?" I burst out laughing.

I love my son, he makes my life interesting.

REBLOG: The first time you realize something is different about your child - Part 2

REBLOG (from 4/26/11)

Yesterday’s blog (REBLOG 11/12/14)was not long enough and didn’t say as much as I could have said. I should have said it took me a long time to realize that HistoryBoy was different from other kids. Not just different but different enough to be excluded by others his own age.

In preschool kids pretty much do their own thing; I play with this you play with that. They may play with the same toys but they don't always intersect play. HistoryBoy also had VERY definite ideas of how to play. You had to play it his way or you couldn’t play with him. He would get very agitated. I just assumed it was immaturity. He was a boy, he was a born 5 ½ weeks early. It would all come in time. But it didn’t. 

His preschool teacher was the one who recommended we get him evaluated by the child study team. Why? Won’t he be ok in

Kindergarten? He has all the skills he needs. Should I have realized he needed help sooner? Did I do something wrong? Did my mommy radar go off somewhere? 

All of these thoughts went through my head. I went home all upset, cried and I realized I couldn’t change anything I had done up to that point. I could only go from here. Kicking myself wouldn’t help HistoryBoy. So I set up the Child Study Team Evaluation and an appointment with a pediatric neurologist. It was just the beginning…

I would love to hear from you. 

Please feel free to leave a comment or email me at teenahope@gmail.com

REBLOG: The first time you realize something is different about your child

first posted 4/25/11

The first time you realize something is different about your child...

You want to cry. Why should he be different? Are you sure little Sally next to him isn't just amazingly gifted or something? He knows his numbers and letters. He speaks well. Ok yes I know he can't sit still very long but he can stay on one topic, as him about trains or start singing a wiggles soundtrack and you are good for hours.



These traits confused the doctors. They decided ADHD was the most prominent condition and once that was under control we could address HistoryBoy's other issues. It was amazing. It took some trial and error to find the right medication but once we did, it worked wonders. So much so that it left little doubt that he also had Asperger's, once the ADHD was under control. With his ADHD under control. he reads almost like some textbook cases of Asperger's. And there is no magic cure or pill for Asperger's, it is trial and error and therapy and hope it works.

The scary part comes now. HistoryBoy is on the cusp of puberty. He is only 10. But we can tell the hormones have started the telltale baby mustache, he has gotten a few zits, and started with mood swings, more so than the normal Aspie ones. Fun stuff I tell you. If anyone had advice on that I will GLADLY take it. I am so not ready for a teenager yet. Like I said he is still 10, he will be 11 this summer... it never gets easier

I would love to hear from you. Please feel free to leave a comment or email me at teenahope@gmail.com

REBLOG: Easter Sunday started out well... (reposted from 04/24/11)

Part 1: The Easter Bunny made his yearly visit we got ready for church, minimal hassle. We got to
church early and got a seat in the balcony which my son from here on called HistoryBoy loves. I personally have trouble walking up the stairs with my hip but that is another issue entirely, but it makes him happy and he will behave all through mass. All is going well until about halfway through he tries to stand the kneeler up. Apparent it was not attached to the pew so it flips over and off under the pew ahead of us. HistoryBoy just shut down. We got the kneeler back in place but he just put his head in his lap and rocked for a few min. I got him back on track mostly by the Our Father, but he was still a little off. Mass ended, crisis over or averted sort of...

Part 2: We decided to go to the Train Station for lunch. We love the food there. HistoryBoy love it because any of you who know him know his first love was trains long before he was the HistoryBoy we know and love. We were seated and ordered and everything was fine, until a bee entered our area.  HistoryBoy cannot be in the same room as a bee. We shooed the bee away, got he re-settled down and the bee came back and he ran out of the room and wouldn't come back. We ended up having to eat our meals in the other room from my parents because the bee was still happily buzzing a the outside tables where my parents were eating.

Part 3: After a rest for myself at home, we went to my mom's to help with Easter dinner prep. HistoryBoy stood on the steps waiting, watching out the window for a full hour, waiting for my brother to arrive with my 2 yr old nephew. He wouldn't move from that spot until they arrived because he didn't want to miss them getting here.

Part 4: It was a long day. Dinner was great, Everybody ate everything they wanted. But HistoryBoy is
exhausted and now easily upset because he is tired. We give him two chores to do, but apparently that was too many, he crashes and burns a starts to bang his head against the wall tonight 3 times them he stops. I tried to get him to stop this behavior but he tells me it calms him, so while it scares the craps out of me it makes him feels better, I think I need the psychologist to explain that one to me...

Each piece had its good parts and each piece had a Aspie trait show up. But if my experiences help you, then it has done some good. :) Look forward to hearing from you

I would love to hear from you. Please feel free to leave a comment or email me at teenahope@gmail.com

Blog Reboot! ASPERGER'S SYNDROME IS NOT A DISEASE!

Over the next few weeks you will see new posts interspersed with some of my old writings to rejuvenate my blog for you (and for me!) To remind me WHY I started this all in the first place

Starting with today, (Originally published 4/23/11)

ASPERGER'S SYNDROME IS NOT A DISEASE!

   I heard someone today refer to Asperger's as a disease. Asperger's Syndrome is very high functioning autism. People who have Asperger's are generally socially inept and immature for their age. They also tend to obsess over one or two things that interest them and not much else. Social interaction is very difficult for kids with Asperger's. 

   They tend to bore other kids because of their single minded obsessions, and thus get picked on a lot. They also get easily bored or frustrated with other kids because they cannot understand why the other kids could care less about the difference between the Titanic and its sister ship the Olympic etc. Also, people with Asperger's have a hard time understanding body language and facial expressions. This makes it difficult for them to realize that other people want to end a conversational topic, or have a turn to talk, or whatever.

   It's hard to watch your child struggle. I try to get my son to talk about how he feels to make it easier and he tries and then suddenly he changes topic to an airplane disaster and I know he is done for now. He works on self-control and how to control his outbursts and meltdowns but sometimes he can't. We've worked on visual clues that is a work in progress..., he is still MUCH better with verbal clues, like Hey let's talk about something else. But when talking about feelings when he is done, there is no getting more out of him when he doesn't want to talk about it. When I push, I can feel him edging closer to a meltdown, so I let him go back to his comfort zone for a bit and try again later.

My son is awesome. Being diagnosed with Asperger's doesn't change that. He is still the same smart, sweet, silly boy, he just adapts differently, and sometimes needs helps adapting to the world around him. As he has gotten older he needs less help because we are teaching him coping mechanisms.

   So, when you are out in a store today and you see a mom with a child that is melting down, don't judge or question her parenting skills (I used to be that mom and HistoryBoy was that kid overwhelmed but the hugeness of the store and number of people and huge amount of noises) Be grateful that is not your child. Ask god to give her the patience and strength to handle what god has given her and help her handle her child's fears.

I would love to hear from you. Please feel free to leave a comment or email me at teenahope@gmail.com