What kind of day is it - Part 3 - An In-between day

If you are reading this, as most of you as aware, most days are in between days. As much as we hope and pray every day is a good day, is isn't. HistoryBoy has what I call them mini-meltdowns alot of days. He still has trouble verbalizing when he gets upset.

For example, we have an appointment. I have been letting him know ahead of time so he can prepare and not be taken unawares, and now it is time to leave but there is 10 minutes left in his TV program. He can't handle missing the end of it. It is a program I know I have seen with him before, so I know he has seen the end of it before. He is getting extremely upset about it though, wringing his hands. So now I have to balance being late to an appointment or dealing with a meltdown and most likely still being late. I decide to sit down, I tell him as soon as the program is over we are out the door. He doesn't even acknowledge me he is back into his program now that he knows he isn't leaving yet. As soon as the credits starts he turns the TV off and is ready to go. He says to me, "Mom I had to see the end. What if it is never on again? Then I never gets to see it again and I missed the end, and I'll forget how it ended." Now I know HistoryBoy's elephant memory doesn't forget anything, but still these are the thoughts he can't verbalize at the time until after the stress of the moment has passed and he is calm. I don't know how to help him in this because I have also found if I try to feed him words in those instances, he latches on, even if it isn't the truth because he hears them and repeats them back. Like if ask him if he is feeling sick. He'll say I feel sick because he thinks it will get him out of the stressful situation.

Most days are like this, and mixture of good and bad. A mini-meltdown, it passes. And life moves on the rest of the day. Sometimes there are two in a day. It depends on what we have to do in a day. The more activities scheduled, the more potential for meltdowns. But we try to move past it. Don't dwell on what happened earlier. It only makes the day worse. It happened, they didn't have control. Now they do, we go on from here and try to make it a better day for ourselves and them.

Whether it is a good day, a bad day, or somewhere in-between, raising children is hard works no matter who the child is. But raising an autistic/Asperger's child takes special guidance and patience from their parents. We are helping them find the keys so that in the future all their days will be good days.

I would love to hear from you. Please feel free to leave a comment or email me at teenahope@gmail.com