Life Training an Autistic 13 Year Old.

Life shouldn't overwhelm you on a daily basis, but welcome to our world, right? In trying to talk to HistoryBoy about the future we've hit a few stumbling blocks. Most times, I can't talk about his future without him having a full blown panic attack. Normal? I think not. But why rock the boat now, he's only 13?  True, but he has to develop some skills for taking care of himself.  I cannot do it forever and I wouldn't want that for him or I either.

Our first big hurdle was simply getting him to make his own breakfast and lunch.  I should say that he will willingly raid the fridge and clean me out of lunch meat without eating a slice of bread on a regular basis if unchecked and he knows how to microwave hot pockets and hot dogs, so he won't starve. But is that living or taking care of himself? 

We talked about it and he understand that is isn't just about now but about the future.  What if some day he wants to cook dinner for a girlfriend.  Does he think she will be impressed with hot pockets?  He came to realize it is a skill he will need even if he is not utilizing it now.  (YAY ME!) 

Another bigggie is me not having to remind him, wash you hair, brush your teeth.  He has been doing these things without reminders more and more frequently.  If I could just get him to remember his meds 100% of the time without my help, we'd be set!




Also, He has been making his bed which is a HUGE thing too.  He used to fight me on it all the time. "Why do I have to make my bed?  Why do I have to clean my room?"  The clean room thing is still a work in progress but he is making his bed with regularity.  He knows how to vacuum, fill/empty the dishwasher, take out the trash and mow a lawn so he will be able to do those things for himself in his own place when the time comes.  For now, he just doesn't mind the chores, as long as I don't bug him about his room.  Remember that Berenstain Bears Book.  That is what his room makes me think of but, eh, one thing at a time.

He wants to be successful, so I am confident he will be.  We just have to take it one day at a time, one skill at a time.  With the knowledge that, one day, who knows how soon, he will need them.

I'd love to hear from you
teenahope@gmail.com