I usually take it easy. Very easy. I know I can't do things two days in a row. But I said I'll push myself a little. Now Day 3, I am barely out of bed. I think I need to boil my body in a HOT HOT bath and hope it helps. Meds didn't seem to help again much today.
I overdid it this weekend and I feel rotten but I wanted to see be able to do things like a "normal" person. Go to a movie on Friday, hang out with friends on Saturday and go to a play on Sunday. My body is crying now and I know I should have NOT gone to the movie but my hubby and son really wanted to go and I gave in. Now it will take me this whole week to recoup and I know it. I need to find a way to enjoy life and not fall apart.
This all started because HistoryBoy had asked to go to the movies, I said I wasn't sure, I would have to see how I was feeling.. He says to me "I wish you were healthier so we could do more fun things." He wasn't trying to be mean, to him it was a logical, Asperger answer. Truthful and logical and just wanting to spend "fun" time with his mom. So I sent my son off to school and called my hubby at work and told him I was going to rest all day so we could go to the movies Friday night. When I already knew I had plans for Sat night and Sun Afternoon. But it was a fun weekend. I just wish my body handled them better.
This is one of the hardest things I find in dealing with chronic pain. Everything is limited and everything is a choice over something else. We are young vibrant women and yet we have to choose to friends over family and vice versa and constantly navigate the guilt of picking something we'd LIKE to do over something we're SUPPOSED to do. Sadly, our bodies often suffer no matter what we choose. But it's important to remember to say "No" when you must... or just because you need that extra day to recover... and always take care of yourself without feeling bad about it.
ReplyDeleteKatie, I know. It's is always choosing someone or something over another. Most of the time, it's ok with my friends and family. They know me and my body now. I guess somehow shortchanging my son felt bad. It is a never ending juggle. Thanks for the comment!
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