Bullying 102

In a previous blog, Bullying 101, I talked about how I realized that bullying isn't something that might happen, it already has and I am prepared for it. At least I hope I am. But I got an introduction to a little more of it this summer.

Sitting by the pool, HistoryBoy comes up to me and asks to make this girl leave him alone. I do not see the girl but if she comes back I tell him let me know and I will help referee. Later on in the day, I am resting and my mom and HistoryBoy that a girl was taking their toys and harassing him so she brought him up to chill out. I could see he was on the verge of a meltdown, so it was probably a good plan.

We headed down the next day to the pool, and the girl was nowhere to be seen. However, later on in the day she shows up and sits down right next to where my son and his friends are playing. I keep an eye on them because I do not want any trouble but she seems intent on reading her book and not bothering the boys. A Little while later, HB is back asking me to make her stop. Now I have been watching, she hasn't been moving closer to them or taking their toys today, so I do not know what the problem is.

To solve the mystery, I move him and his stuff to the other side of the pool. I notice now that she is periodically getting up and walking by the boys. I can't hear what she is saying to them, if she is saying anything, but she is obviously agitating Matthew just because she keeps coming by. I call him over to me. Apparently she has a book, that I am not familiar with that has alot of cats in it and some of them seem like gross, grotesque pictures to HB. He doesn't like it and has told he doesn't want to see them but she keeps walking by. I had seen the last page she had open, I couldn't tell exactly what it was, but it wasn't a cute cuddly cat. As we walk back into the pool, he makes a comment to her about stopping, those pictures are just evil. She looks at me, and flips her book open to a picture of a kitten and says "Is this evil?" HB is unwinding quickly, "That's not what she was showing us." I believe you. Just stay away from her now.

Now I know the score. She was probably only a little older than HistoryBoy. Maybe 13 at the oldest I think, but she wanted to mess with him. I don't know why. Maybe it was because he was the only one who freaked out when she tried to freak the kids out and she liked it. Bullying like this is never easy to spot. I could have been completely unaware of it if I wasn't as in tune with my son and his reactions. I know he wasn't lying to me, not that he can't exaggerate but I had seen her as well, so I knew she was up to something. A part of me wishes I had confronted her and made her apologize or at least explain her actions but she is not my kid or my responsibility. I removed my son and his buddies from the situation, so I felt that was enough. But if I see her next year and she tries it again! GAME ON! LOL

Thankfully she checked out a day or so later and we got a influx of new kids. Which was both good and bad. More on that tomorrow.

Feel free to leave a comment or email me at teenahope@gmail.com