Please Don't Overwhlem The Autistic Child

Most of the time HistoryBoy seems like every other 10 year old. He will run around at recess playing cops and robbers (as long as his two best friends are there). He plays with Madison our Black Lab Retriever. He is kind and loving. But when he is different, it is very visible.

One day several years ago, I am trying to remember which classroom he was in. (It was 1st or 2nd grade) But it is sort of irrelevant. I was room mom, as I have been I think every year for HistoryBoy. I put my name in with a note that says if they is a mom who wants it and hasn't been room mom, let her have it. Must not be a lot of room moms out there I guess, because I get it each year. LOL :) Anyway, I leave the room, for a bathroom break or to get something, I don't know. When I come back in and my son is cowering under his desk, rocking.

I go to him, What is wrong? I am immediately approached by someone whose name I do not remember, but probably looked like a troll, and not one of those cute troll dolls, NO a Lord of the Rings CAVE TROLL. Yes I feel better now. She told me that my son had pushed her and would not come out to apologize ....

OK... Why did he push you? What happened? "Well I saw he had one of those cookies on his plate and you said he had allergies so I was taking it from him. I told him to stop So he pushed me and went under his desk and now won't come out,"

I gave him that cookie. He CAN have it. He knew it. He does not respond well to adults yelling at him and taking away things his mother has given him. He has Asperger's, now he is melting down. He should not have pushed you but he is in no condition to apologize to you right now and will not be for a while until he calms down. "Make him do it now."

At that point, before I pushed her myself, I told his teacher I was leaving and signing my son out. It still took me about 10 minutes for me to convince him to come out from under his desk. But I was done with the evil troll lady.

Then another time we are out at Target and HistoryBoy is looking at baseball cards (actually I think he is looking at those build-able transformer and pirate cards but anyway) which are right by the check out lanes. And this old guy apparently think HistoryBoy is up to no good because his mom (me) is not standing with him and he (HistoryBoy) won't answers any of weird old guys questions.

When I approach with my cart I can tell HistoryBoy is approaching meltdown city. His eyes are almost tearing. He latches on to me an hides behind me. "Is that boy deaf or mute?" No. "He was getting into trouble, stealing stuff. I caught him just in time"

Now, Creepy old guy is not a Target employee, apparently he is just a guy there to scare my son. So I say 'My son was looking at the cards while I went to get laundry detergent. He was picking out what he wanted to get.' "He won't look me in the eye. He is up to something and he won't answer me when I ask him a question."

This creepy old guy may mean well and all, hey if HistoryBoy was stealing I would want to know, but I know he wasn't, he just doesn't talk to adults he doesn't. So today instead of saying My son has Asperger's, and getting a blank stare from Mr Creepy. I just say My son is autistic. He looks at me and says "Oh, I had a cousin like that when I was a kid." And he walks away. O-ok.

How do we protect our children from all the people who would yell at them and overwhelm their senses, some of them well meaning, some of them jerks. Maybe I should just buy/make him a T-shirt that says, it YES, I have Asperger's, and YES it is a form of Autism. Today may be ok, tomorrow not so much. I think we could all use a shirt like that!